Wayne was born at a very early age and has not died yet, which is something he considers to be a bit of an achievement.

He joined Freemasonry in 2006, went into the chair for the first time in 2011, and started giving talks across several Provinces in early 2017, before joining NWAMS as a speaker in 2021.

He Is an accidentally established Masonic author and has had articles published in several Masonic and non-Masonic periodicals.

by Wayne Pendragon Owens

I am an Author, Freemason, Rosicrucian, Blood Biker, Widows Son, CodeNinja, Spod, Hacker, Son, Uncle, Brother, Man, AN INDIVIDUAL!

27th February 2009

Cyborgs Work for the RAC

An interesting thing happened to me on the way to work…

I start my car and leave home heading to the Insane Asylum. I stop off at the petrol station to fill up on diesel, notice one of my tires is looking a bit deflated. After several failed attempts at humor to make it feel a bit better, I pull over to the air compressor for a “top up” only the machine is broke :o(

No problems“. Says I, as I head on my way to work. About a half mile from the office there is a garage, so I stop there to make use of their working compressor.

Jump back into the car, turn the key, and watch as the Glow Plug light flashes on and off doing an impression of an indicator light. “Humm” I think, “that’s a bit odd“, but I try starting the car anyway. I am an optimist.

chugga chugga chugga….. chugga chugga chugga….

Nothing? No starting. nothing!

Arse!!, I open the bonnet, realise I do not know much about the modern diesel engine. But I am a man god dammit! I therefore proceed to prod about a bit in the male belief that “it cant hurt!“. Jump back into car… Nothing.

Ok, I may be male, but I do admit my limitations. Quick phone to the helpful RAC people. And caused some slight amusement. examples:-

Me: “My car wont start, the diesel light is flashing and it just doesn’t start

RAC: “What’s the correct term for that light?

Me: “err no idea… I call it the yellow coil light

RAC: “There’s a proper name for it

Me: “Hang on, I’m googling it now.”

RAC: “You said you were stuck on the side of a road?

Me: “Got to love smart phones!

So the emergency call was sent out, and so I just had to wait the one hour estimated turn up time. I amused myself talking to the fellow inmates at the asylum on NetIM (See reference to Jibber Jabber)

A Short While Later!!

The RAC mechanic turns up. I get out of car and explain the problem, “yellow coil light flashes, and engine no work!” (I’m good with technical wordies me!).  To demonstrate my point more, I attempt to start my car.

Hummmmm, Odd!” says the mechanic, Who pops the hood, leans on the car looks at the engine “Humm” goes to the drivers side, and starts the engine on his first go.  He then proceeds to stop and start the engine several times to check its working.

This is my second call out today” He says looking thoughtful, “And both times the car has just worked as soon as I turned up!

The mans a Borg. the one time he touched the car he released nanobots that repaired the damage.  I will be recommending the RAC to everyone now.