After extensive testing on Britain’s crater-filled road network, Tesla has reportedly abandoned suspension upgrades altogether and gone straight for an actual flying car.
A Tesla spokesperson is rumoured to have said, “After hitting three potholes, losing GPS signal in one and needing a wheel alignment every Tuesday, we concluded the ground was no longer a viable transport surface.”
The first prototype Roadster successfully travelled from Wrexham to Chester without touching a single pothole. Mostly because it never touched the road.
At this rate, potholes won’t be getting fixed. We’ll all just need pilot licences.
Disclaimer: Not entirely true… but it feels more realistic than the powers that be getting the roads repaired.